this week

It’s always fun to spot The Latte Years out in the wild! I don’t think seeing my book on a library shelf will ever get old. I also love how our State Library puts a little Tassie sticker on the spine if you’re a local author.

Sometimes I’m glad I just went with This Week as the title of these weekly updates - something simple, rather than anything clever or exciting. I got trained out of that some years ago when the Elders of the Internet suddenly told us that blog post titles that were too clever, a pun or a play on words, where the reader might have to work for the meaning, were bad for SEO, or led to lower engagement and higher bounce rates. I get the rationale for it, I do.

But if I were giving each weekly update post its own title, this week I might have gone with The Physics of Failure.

A supremely clever and dear friend of mine is an engineer and that is her specialty. But I also think it’s a fantastic summation of trying to write the first draft of a complicated novel.

Take this equation from my most recent work day - write 500 words, delete 5000. What kind of algorithm is that? How is it possible to estimate or predict anything about the creative process? “Honestly, who would do this?” my colleague wrote back in solidarity when we exchanged emails about our writing progress that day.

But I do want to do this, as excruciating as it is. Putting a book together, as Annie Dillard writes, is “interesting and exhilarating. It is sufficiently difficult and complex that is engages all your intelligence. It is life at its most free.”

So, there is nothing to do but keep buggering on, as Winston Churchill said. I steel myself as I prepare for the week ahead, but also I’m rather excited as I wonder whether the draft might be completely different this time next week. What might happen? What might I discover?

Favourite experience/s of the week

Coffee with my parents at a cafe for the first time in about a year (in a cafe, that is, I have seen my parents often in that time!). I’m grateful that hanging out with them regularly is now the norm, no longer a biennial event, though I still savour spending time with them, all the same.

A visit to the hairdresser for the first time since February! My last hairdresser sadly moved away so I had to find a replacement - the lovely lady who did my hair on Tuesday recognised me once I pulled my mask down to take a sip of water. It turned out she did my sister’s hair for her wedding, many years ago. Hashtag Hobart!

Reading

Again mostly PhD stuff but I also managed to read Karen Hitchcock’s The Medicine: A Doctor’s Notes, a collection of her essays about what it’s like to work in the Australian public health system today - interestingly, published in February 2020 and therefore some of her warnings about the dire state of things proved to be correct. Her writing is so insightful and sharp and quite haunting. Karen has been one of my favourite writers for years, ever since I listened to a highly entertaining and engaging interview with her on the ABC in 2010, which I also very much recommend as well as her book of short stories.

I’m also spending some time with Annie Dillard in her restorative and elemental The Writing Life.

Listening to

The First Time: Masters Series - Christos Tsolkias. I managed Part One, which was great, and Part Two is even more insightful but I’ve still got some of that to go, so that’s first on the list for my next walk. Such a talented, humble man and so passionate. I particularly loved this bit from Part Two:

I get told that people want to write revolutionary stuff; they want to write radical stuff; they want to burn the world; [where] their writing is “talking back to the man”…and then, it’s the most timid writing. Everyone I speak to seems to be terrified of what someone’s going to say about them on Twitter so they will not risk an opinion that is challenging. And, more vilely, they won’t defend a friend who gets attacked because they’re scared of the damage that will come their way.

Christos was referring to the mindset and viewpoint of his characters Christo and Andrea in his latest novel 7 1/2 but these are thoughts he, like anyone writing a contemporary novel, has as well. I think it holds a lot of truth!

I also discovered that the Dandy Warhols released an extremely interesting album, that’s about four hours long, in 2020 called Tafelmuzik Means More When You’re Alone - I’ve not yet listened to the whole thing as it’s not quite writing music, though the first two tracks could be. It takes the concept of Tafelmuzik, which was designed to be played to accompany banquets in the 16th century, and turns it on its head a bit. It’s meditative and weird and I kind of love it.

I’ve also had Nils Frahm’s Lemon Day on repeat this week, and while writing this post!

Seriously sensational mashed potato flatbreads.

Eating

The week’s eats were:

Sunday: All-in-one sweet potato Thai curry from The Green Roasting Tin by Rukmini Iyer - this was luscious and so easy to make when we’d got in late from watching the football with the family. It was lovely and soupy, a bit like a laksa.

Monday: Jerk-spiced lentils with rice and mashed potato flatbreads. The flatbreads were seriously out of this world and totally worth having to have all the windows and doors open because of how smoky the kitchen got! Next time I’ll do them on the barbecue but WOW, they tasted like the naan from the Indian street food stall at Spitalfields Market, where I used to prowl around on a Thursday lunchtime back in the day. I can write up the recipe if you like but it was very simple - equal parts leftover mashed potato and self-raising flour, with a bit of soy milk to bind it all together. Spread each flatbread with butter or vegan equivalent while you keep them warm. We had the leftover flatbread (I’m amazed there was any left) with soup the next day for lunch.

Tuesday: It was meant to be risotto, but I ruined it by adding something that had gone off to it (why didn’t I check it first?!) so we ended up having hot chips in the air fryer and a packet of Digestive biscuits. Plus wine. That might have been why the risotto was ruined.

Wednesday: Jerk spiced lentils with pasta (as an alternative bolognese, it’s very delicious).

Thursday: Vegan curried sausages with rice and greens. Very yummy! I was trying to recreate the dish I remembered from my childhood after a chat with my new hairdresser about comfort food, but it wasn’t quite how I remembered it. I think my parents might have used a milder curry powder as well as extra turmeric and milk instead of stock to get more nutrition into their growing girls. I recall the sauce being neon yellow, and very creamy. More experiments needed.

Friday: Jerk spiced lentils with pasta again - I had no desire to repeat Tuesday’s disaster so went with something safe! After a long day, the most I could handle was boiling water and stirring a sauce through.

Saturday: Burger and chips, which we hadn’t had for quite a while. I put some aged walnut cheese on mine which felt rather decadent.

I also made another stash of Nigella’s vegan gingerbread which happily keeps for weeks, and Rachel Ama’s ginger lime cake from her brilliant One Pot book. One cannot write a book without cake. And tea. There’s been plenty of that too.

Watching

Mission Impossible: Fallout (4K Blu Ray) - a Tom choice, but I have been pleasantly surprised by how enjoyable the Mission Impossible franchise is. A bit like James Bond (up until recently that is!), I relax a lot knowing that Ethan Hunt will never be killed off and will therefore pretty much get out of every situation, however dire and un-winnable it appears. That helps me enjoy an action film a lot more. Though I was genuinely sad and shocked when Alec Baldwin’s character doesn’t make it (sorry for the spoiler!). And the sprightly presence of Simon Pegg makes any film a joy to watch.

Sisters (Blu Ray) - we watched this in 2015 and, being so new to Tina Fey’s work at that point and most of the SNL alumni (I know, what rock had I been living under?), I have to confess I didn’t enjoy it on the first watch. We gave it another try this weekend, having become great fans of Amy Poehler and Paula Pell in the intervening years as well, and on this watch I thought it was fantastic. Perhaps I just get the humour more, or recognised so many of the cast, or perhaps now I’m in my early forties, the same age as the protagonists, everything felt a tad more relatable? Either way, I’m really glad we gave it another go.

The Brittas Empire (DVD) - Tom surprised me with the boxset as an early anniversary present and we’ve been laughing non-stop. A lot of comedies from the 1990s have not aged brilliantly but this one is an exception. I was only a child when this show was originally televised and there is something about revisiting shows that you enjoyed as a kid about workplaces and obnoxious bosses as an adult that just gives it so much more meaning and that rings true so much more. I wonder if my favourite blog Ask A Manager might ever dissect Gordon Brittas’ management style for a laugh?!

Quote of the week

Spotted in London a few months ago….

“Create. Every day. And making excuses does not count.” - Wrdsmith

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! Let me know what you’ve been up to, and what’s been inspiring you, if you like. I love hearing from you. Stay well, until next week! xx

this week

Daphne, one of my favourite smells, and prolific at this time of year. I brought some to my office so I could smell it all day while I’m writing.

I know I say this nearly every week but I’m not entirely sure where this week has gone.

But this week I know why - because I have been putting my head down to make some serious headway on my novel. My supervisors would like to see a full draft by the end of August and so on Monday I printed out the current draft as it stands, all 370 pages of it, and have been lost in that world ever since. Hours pass and I barely move, apart from my fingers on the keyboard.

It has reminded me a lot of when I was writing The Latte Years with a short deadline, around a full time job and everything else that life in London entailed. Days became weeks very quickly.

I’ve decided for the next few weeks, while I’m ensconced in my work, that my This Week posts will be written and published on a Sunday instead of Friday (which frankly has usually meant Saturday!). That takes the pressure off considerably and allows me to devote writing time during the week to the PhD, which is absolutely where it needs to be spent.

It also means that my This Week posts might not be all that exciting for the next little while - if all I’m doing is writing, sleeping, eating and exercising, there might not be much to report! But I’m a firm believer that it’s the little details that are worth paying attention to in life, where we might see interesting patterns, and where we might learn a lot about ourselves.

Favourite experience/s of the week

I loved making some serious headway on my draft. I found myself waking in the mornings, itching to get back to it. I am delighted and frankly relieved that I’ve hit this point with it - it has been a hard slog over the past two years, where research has been so much easier than trying to enter this world with my imagination. I knew I had only got to know these people superficially - I had shaken their hands and nodded politely at them across the room, not sat beside them at a campfire or, God forbid, kicked down their bedroom doors (as the wonderful Morag Joss once instructed me to do). I had a wonderful video chat with a dear friend in London who is also a theatre director, so she is well-versed in making characters come alive. We workshopped a few ideas together and she really encouraged me to step up and take ownership of my subject as a character - I have to invent, because the historical record is so sparse.

Things I was grateful for this week

Is it lame to say my husband? He went out to get some groceries while I was working at home and I heard him come back, shuffling at the front door with the keys and bags. I hopped up and opened the door for him, and he was standing there with a huge bouquet of tulips in his arms. He never misses an opportunity to show me he’s proud of me. I’m so deeply grateful for how supportive he is.

Tea and a pile of library books. Two of my favourite things.

Reading

Honestly? 99 per cent of my reading this week has been PhD stuff. My notebooks, flicking through them looking for things I know I wrote down months ago in a flash of inspiration, or for obscure references that I thought would come in handy. Wonderful books lent to me by my supervisors, poetic deconstruction and interpretation of sparse archives. Combing through JSTOR for papers on fictive memoir and metaphorical mapping in Margaret Atwood’s Alias Grace. There hasn’t been a dull moment!

But I also like to read for pleasure as well, where I can! I got myself a pile of library books yesterday and brought them back to an empty, silent house. I put Ludovico Einaudi on the stereo, brewed a cup of tea and dove into the pile. My happy place.

I’ve already read Breathing Space which is a wonderful collection of poetry, essays, art and short fiction from Tasmanian writers and artists about our changing relationship with this state’s landscape. I adored it. And I know a few of the contributors, which is always special.

Listening to

The First Time: Masters Series - Tony Birch. I had of course heard of Tony and read his writing, but I had never listened to an interview with him before and I was spellbound. He really emphasised the importance of getting into a good working routine for your writing - whatever works for you - and I also appreciated what he said about rejection. I was still feeling sad about one I’d had the week before and his words were really bolstering - and to know that even a writer of his stature still gets turned down was very comforting!

WILD with Sarah Wilson: Ask Me Anything with Melissa Hemsley - fabulous episode, full of Sarah’s usual thoughtfulness and proactive take on life. I must admit I had been feeling a bit despairing over the climate crisis of late and listening to this made me feel hopeful again.

We Can Do Hard Things with Glenn Doyle - OMG, how had I not discovered this podcast until now?! (answer - most likely because I have not been on social media since January). Thank goodness for my walking commute! I have saved so many episodes to listen to but this week I managed both Cheryl Strayed episodes, both Liz Gilbert episodes, and the Reese Witherspoon episode. They were all fabulous and just such great reminders of how important it is to be resilient, courageous and make the contribution that you are here to make.

Best Friend Therapy: Toxic Friendships - how do we define friendship? What makes a friendship toxic? What can we do about it? - I’ve already listened to this twice so that probably tells you how deeply relatable I found this episode. I particularly appreciated their definition of friendship which was thinking of the other person with goodwill, wanting the best for them (even if it means you don’t get what you want from them) and always making generous assumptions. Life is a lot easier when you have generous assumptions! There tends to be less drama too.

Thursday’s tofu fried rice - always a favourite!

Eating

The week’s eats were:

Saturday: Pizza night with family

Sunday: I did a big cook up and made our winter favourite Pip casserole (vegan version obvs!) and Rachel Ama’s Jerk-spiced Lentils, both of which kept us going through the week! We had the casserole with chunks of homemade bread.

Monday: Jerk-spiced Lentils with coconut rice and flatbread. Seriously, every recipe of Rachel Ama’s that I’ve tried has been incredible and this was no exception. If you’re a vegan you need to get her books immediately!

Tuesday: Casserole with flatbread

Wednesday: Jerk-spiced lentils with pasta (it made a delicious pasta sauce!)

Thursday: Tofu fried rice (using leftover rice from Monday)

Friday: Sweet potato and coconut soup (loosely followed this recipe) with bread

Saturday: Nigella’s puttanesca, veganised (use 2 tablespoons of miso paste instead of anchovies) and with shredded chard from the garden added.

The bread machine has been getting a workout (it’s a wonderful enticement to get up with my alarm, as I time it to be finished at the same time. Whatever works!), I made another loaf of banana bread, and also an ill-fated tray of granola which was gutting. I prepared it so lovingly - coconut oil, vanilla and organic honey I wanted to use up melted down, stirred through nuts, almond meal, seeds and coconut into clustered sweetness - only for it to burn in the too-hot oven. The place smelled of honey, coconut and vanilla for days, the promise of what could have been hanging in the air! Sad face. I managed to salvage about half a cup of dark brown on the cusp of burnt granola, and it was pretty nice. Sigh. I will be much more careful next time and watch it like a hawk!

Watching

Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation (4K Blu-Ray - Tom was keen I make the distinction, haha!) - I quite enjoyed this! The highlight was realising that one of the shady guys was Cecil the choirmaster from the Vicar of Dibley, haha!

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot (iTunes) - apart from Sisters (which I may need to give another chance), I love everything Tina Fey is in and this was no exception. The year is 2003 and a news writer (Fey) stuck in a rut decides to chuck in her comfortable but depressingly mundane life, and volunteers to report from the frontline of the war in Afghanistan. Unsurprisingly, her life is utterly transformed (to put it mildly) by the experience. Admittedly a certain amount of suspension of disbelief is required when watching Anglo actors play locals but overall I found the heart of this film to be in pretty much the right place. It’s well shot, well paced and also, despite its serious subject matter, very funny in places.

Quote of the week

At the library yesterday I picked up a book I’ve read before - The Writing Life by Annie Dillard - and at random it fell open at this page when I picked it up.

“Aim for the chopping block. If you aim for the wood, you will have nothing. Aim past the wood, aim through the wood; aim for the chopping block.” - Annie Dillard

I think of this as encouragement to see the bigger picture, widening one’s perspective rather than being focused too narrowly on the wood itself - the finished work, the published book, and how it is received. Don’t worry about doing it perfectly. Focus on the act of writing itself, the chopping block.

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! I hope you’re staying safe and well, wherever you are xx

this week

Blossom watch has started….

We’re at that time of year where the mornings are getting (slightly) lighter and we’re no longer under a cloak of darkness at 4:45pm; where you can see bright jonquils springing up in gardens and the beginnings of blossom on the trees. There’s still frost on the cars in the mornings, the air is still bitingly cold, and I can’t see myself wearing a dress without tights any time soon, but we have entered that stage in the season where everything is waking up, the wheel is turning and soon there will be barbecues, bare arms and beach swims after work again. I’m looking forward to summer. Winter has felt especially long this year, even after spending some of it in the UK. A weird feeling, but then it’s been a pretty weird year.

Favourite experience/s of the week

A book was sent to me to review and it must have been sent from the future because it was (mistakenly) addressed to “Dr Philippa Moore” which made me laugh but also filled me with utter delight. That’s still at least two and a half years away but nice to think it might have already happened in a parallel universe!

Browsing a bookstore looking for a gift for a friend while it poured with rain outside and acoustic Missy Higgins was playing on the stereo.

A walk at dusk with Tom where we encountered many friendly wallabies. Some fellow walkers also enjoying the area after dark mentioned that tawny frogmouths (a bit like owls) can be seen on occasion!

Hearing that a surprise I sent a friend in New Zealand made it there!

A lovely chat with my dear friend in London, seeing her sitting in her garden with the sun beating down, and finding it so bizarre that I was sitting in the exact same place just two months ago!

Solitude as I worked in my office at uni, which smells of old library books and chai. Two of my favourite smells.

Having dinner with my sister and my nephew, who is a sweet and caring young man who I am really enjoying getting to know better.

Things I was grateful for this week

A few clear sunny days in a row, in which to hang washing out and get it dry. Ah, the things you get excited about in your forties!

Encouragement, support and always useful feedback from my PhD supervisors, which led to a productive week.

The abundance of my tiny garden, even in winter, with chard, spinach and thick celery picked fresh for nearly every meal.

When the little stings come, being able to absorb the wisdom of other writers who have been there. And having a husband who also gives the best hugs.

A healthy body that can walk and run and take just about anything I throw at it. But, as Neil Young put it, “I’m gettin’ old” so eye tests have also been booked. On that note, I’m also grateful to live in a country with public healthcare where eye tests are still bulk-billed.

Also grateful to science and the caring medical professionals who gave Tom and I our second covid boosters today - our fourth jab in total. Vaxxed to the max!

A few poetry collections I’m savouring at the moment.

Reading

Poetry. Mountains of it. I can’t get enough. The picture shows a few of the collections I’m working my way through (most of them purchased from Foyles in London). I also have the collected works of Philip Larkin, Adrienne Rich and Judith Wright which I’ve been dipping in and out of. Online, my discoveries of the week were Felicity Plunkett’s “What the Sea Remembers” and Anne Sexton’s “Her Kind”. Nikki Gemmell once said that poetry is her tuning fork when she writes fiction, and it is mine too.

The Conversation: A Brief History of Curry in Australia by my colleague Dr Frieda Moran (curried wombat was once a thing, apparently!)

Lithub: The Childfree Effigy: On Network’s Diana and the Tropes that Betray Women. A brilliant essay on how the image of a childfree woman has been controlled in Hollywood over the past five or so decades. “Were it women directing 85 percent of Hollywood films today, how might that change the global perception of power, and even power itself?” So much yes in this article!

The Guardian: Greta Gerwig films - ranked! Greta is one of my favourite directors (if not my favourite….though Jane Campion has held top spot for a long time) and I enjoyed this ranking of all her films, that she’s directed, written or acted in. I disagree with Greenberg being number one though! Ladybird or Little Women should have grabbed that spot. Thoughts, fellow Greta fans?

Sydney Review of Books: Taking our Time - a very interesting essay about how academic work has both intensified and been increasingly devalued over the last few decades, and hence how time is measured in relation to academic workloads, as well as freedom to pursue research and thought without (too much) restraint or control, has changed. Lots of food for thought.

Listening to

After hearing an unfamiliar song of hers in the bookshop, I’ve been listening to everything Missy Higgins has recorded since 2012. Her latest EP Total Control is fabulous. “Watch Out” is my favourite track.

Michael Kiwanuka - so fantastic. I particularly love “Piano Joint (This Kind Of Love)” and the Claptone remix of “You Ain’t The Problem”. That’s been a particularly reassuring song for the last year or so!

Fable released a new album, Shame, last week and Tom is a huge fan! We listened to it on repeat over the weekend and I really loved it. Powerful, intense and haunting, but so listenable.

But my most incredible listening experience of the week is in the Watching section….

Thursday’s tofu fried rice - always a favourite!

Eating

The week’s eats were as follows:

Saturday: Pasta bake

Sunday: Minestrone soup with homemade bread

Monday: Sweet potato and lentil curry (made with my homemade Sri Lankan curry powder) and rice

Tuesday: Linda McCartney’s Deep Dish Pie with mash, green beans and peas, which I made for my sister and nephew who joined us for dinner. They brought a warm vegan brownie for dessert, which was also scrumptious! No leftovers, unsurprisingly.

Wednesday: Minestrone soup with homemade bread (leftovers from Sunday)

Thursday: Tofu fried rice (using leftover rice from Monday)

Tonight: who knows?! Probably pasta. Maybe sweet potato mac and cheese (which I now make a vegan version of - and it’s so good!)

There have also been a lot of winter smoothies for breakfast. A winter smoothie is, quite simply, a smoothie made with a mixture of fresh winter fruits and dried fruits. A typical one for me and Tom is:

one large apple/one large pear/one large orange + one frozen banana + two Medjool dates + frozen or fresh spinach + ground flaxseed/LSA + maca powder + tahini/peanut butter + cinnamon + almond milk + a hefty scoop of porridge oats. All blended together. It tastes amazing! And gets lots of fibre and good things into you.

Admittedly, it’s not the most warming breakfast on a two degree morning when there’s frost on the cars outside (!) but always delicious! Add a side of Vegemite toast and that’s our WFH breakfast most days. Smoothies were something I really missed when we were couch-surfing/housesitting/staying with my parents when we first moved back here. No one seemed to have a blender!

Next week we have a few long work days in a row so this weekend will most likely involve a few cook-ups so there’s a tub of soup, curry or pasta sauce to simply reheat when we get in. I’m keen to try a few new things too so we’ll see what inspires me! I’m keen to make those cabbage rolls I made last week again, so let’s hope Hill Street Grocer has plenty of cabbages…

Watching

The most profound watching (and also listening) experience of my week was Kasey Chambers’ cover of Eminem’s “Lose Yourself”. The original was a favourite running song of mine in years gone by but this is something else. I found myself in tears at this performance’s energy and power. There was something about this song being sung by a woman in her 40s, hair spilling down to her waist and a banjo in her hands, a song of melancholy, anger and hopelessness, and how it slowly built and built until it exploded into energy and power and…magic, for want of a better word. Seriously, just watch it. I have barely stopped thinking about it.

Tom and I also enjoyed a long overdue rewatch of a favourite film, Scott Pilgrim vs. The World. This film is very special to us. We went to see it at the cinema in September 2010, a few days after we were married. My parents had left that day to return to Australia and we were feeling a bit blue, as we always were when Aussie family and friends departed after a visit, and in need of perking up, we decided to stroll up the King’s Road and go to the movies. The minute the film started, we knew we were going to love it - and we did! It was absolutely hilarious and still is, nearly twelve years later. I also recognised a lot of places in the movie from my trip to Toronto (where it’s set) which at the time had only been three years earlier (it has now been 15 years!!). On my trip I had paid a visit to the record store (Sonic Boom) and I so loved going to Second Cup for my signature beverage at the time (I’m sure you can guess). It’s just one of those movies that’s full of good memories and associations for us, and one I think we’ll probably watch once a year forever and never tire of. Do you have a movie like that?

Quote of the week

“I’m just going to write because I cannot help it.” - Charlotte Brontë. This is a card I bought at the Haworth Parsonage in Yorkshire in June, which I plan to have framed for my study at some point.

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! I hope you’re keeping safe, well and warm or cool, wherever you are xx

this week

How small we are compared to the vastness of nature.

I found myself pondering paradoxes, contrasts and dualities this week - how we think things are compared to how they actually are. How on Monday morning I read The Guardian in bed with a coffee, shaken at the news of rising inflation and cost of living, the likes that have not been seen for 30 years in this country; and then headed to work at my desk, where my inbox was overflowing with click frenzy sales for items I didn’t need from merchants I suppose I must have given my email address to but whose wares I have no use for at this point in time. Conflicting messages from every direction. How hard it can be to keep one’s head amongst it all.

I also thought about how being back in Tasmania has warped time for me, in some respects. I am not the 24-year-old who left, though many people treat me as though I am. As though a pause button was somehow pressed (where is it? How do I find it?!), as though everything that has happened to me over the past seventeen years happened to someone else. Oddly, sometimes my life does feel like it did then, as though it is yet to really get going. But unlike when I was actually 24, there’s lots of promise and potential, that I try to maximise at every opportunity. I was therefore surprised to look up the details of a Young Tasmanian Writer’s Fellowship and discover that I didn’t qualify - in fact, the cut-off for me qualifying was age 30, well over a decade ago! That was a real jolt back to reality, that even though I feel I’m very much still on a journey and don’t feel that different to who I was in my twenties (just wiser and less tolerant of bullshit, I’d say), the world seems to think I should have it more together by now! I honestly forget how old I am a lot of the time. I’m smiling as I write this because I know how ridiculous it sounds. Am I really that deluded? Is it the effect of the pandemic, the bizarre melting down of days, weeks and months into time candles that we think we can still light but when we strike the match, we find they’ve already burned down?

I was also reminded of how beautiful Tasmania is, particularly in the winter. A friend and I had an adventure down at the Tahune Airwalk, which I had never been to before, and what a tonic it was to breathe such fresh cold air, revel in the natural beauty of the place, cross the Huon River on a swinging bridge, and be left speechless at the sheer majesty of the trees.

Favourite experience/s of the week

The Tahune Airwalk, by far! It’s tucked away deep in the south west of the state, and we did a lovely hike through it, including two swinging bridges and the air walk itself, which feels like you’re suspended among the extremely tall, majestic treetops. If you don’t like heights, maybe it’s not for you! But I loved the thrill of it.

It moved me greatly to think that some of the stringybarks were there, alive and growing, during the period I’ve been researching and writing about (1820s). These trees well and truly outlived my characters, and they will likely outlive me too. It made me think about how small we are, in terms of the vastness of nature and its incredible power to survive. That even through fire and destruction, nature will find a way to come back. We must take our place beside nature, not dominate it or bend it to our will.

The air was fresh, invigorating and cold from the nearby Hartz mountains, and the Huon River had chunks of ice floating in it. Being winter, the off season, the place was almost deserted and it was such a treat and an honour to practically have it to ourselves.

I shot some video too which I’ll edit together at some point for you all, to hopefully entice you to visit yourselves!

We drove back to Hobart via Geeveston for the famous Masaaki sushi and then another stop at Kingston Beach where we indulged in my favourite post bushwalk treat, whatever the weather - cold beer and hot chips.

Nature, fresh air, a dear friend and chips! The perfect Saturday.

Reading

Island Magazine: Living Poets by Jessica Lim - I too am rereading A Room of One’s Own and am quite blown away by its relevance for contemporary women, so I enjoyed this article very much.

Meanjin: I (re)discovered their What I’m Reading column and enjoyed trawling through the archives during a much needed brain break. I particularly enjoyed James McKenzie Watson, Melissa Manning and Emilie Collyer.

Gwenn Seemel: Making Art When The World Is Ending - “even if this is the conjunction of horrible that actually kills us all (or makes us wish we were dead), I’ll have seen it through by making love tangible across space and time. I’ll have been creating objects that make people feel seen and understood. I’ll have been opening myself and others to new worlds and different ways of thinking, helping people to get outside of their own narrow experience and allowing them to become better and more loving.” YES to all of this.

Annabel Smith: How to Become a Writer with Imbi Neeme - every guest of Annabel’s puts their own spin on the theme and the questions, it’s never the same which is part of the charm! I particularly enjoyed how Imbi structured it. I also liked how Imbi described herself as “a recovering blogger, an impending novelist” which I might borrow to describe myself in future!

Guernica: Sharp Relief - Watching Yoko Ono’s “Cut Piece” post Roe

In terms of books, I’ve been reading a lot of gardening and cookbooks, most of which I’ve borrowed from the library, and I finished Stolen by Lucy Christopher, the YA prequel to her just-released adult fiction, Release, which I’ll be reading next. It’s a dark, brutal but stunningly told story, bringing the harsh beauty of the Australian desert to vivid life, and so clever as to how you, the reader, end up with Stockholm syndrome as the narrator does. I can’t wait for Release!

Listening to

My general “for writing” and “moody dramatic” writing playlists were on repeat as I worked (and reworked!) on a 10,000 word section of my novel to send as part of a fellowship submission (fingers crossed). I also discovered the soundtrack (written by John Barry) to a 1980 film called Somewhere in Time which is actually beautiful to write to.

Best Friend Therapy: Fertility - what’s the reality? How does the language impact us? How can we support each other? This is an issue that has affected so many people I know. Feeling seen, heard and supported is so important. If you need a good cry, listen to this episode - that’s really all I have to say!

The Imperfects: I’m still really enjoying working my way through the archives of this show. This week I listened to Dr Emily, Truth vs Harmony - and boy did this resonate with me!

James and Ashley Stay at Home: This past week, James had his debut novel published! This episode did a behind the scenes look at Denizen and made me even more excited to read it!

The First Time: Masters Series: Liane Moriarty - I had no idea that Liane had written the part of Perry’s mother (in the second season of Big Little Lies) specifically with Meryl Streep in mind, and then got her to play the role! The power of acting ‘as if’! Fabulous.

Winter Nachos

Eating

Rather than a taco mac and cheese with last week’s leftovers, I made winter nachos! Leftover cauliflower stalk and lentil taco mixture bulked out with a tin of black beans and reheated; topped with cashew queso, mashed avocado, raw kale massaged with cider vinegar, pickled jalapeños, vegan sour cream and pickled tomatoes. Bloody delicious if I do say so myself.

Cabbage rolls - pre sauce and baking!

I also made some incredible cabbage rolls (no recipe yet, I saw one in a cookbook that I loosely followed, but not really! I can write up what I did if anyone is interested, as I’ll definitely make this again). I had some leftover rice and so turned that into the stuffing. I flavoured it with spices, green vegetables and herbs from the garden, dried cranberries, chopped almonds and some various bits and pieces lying around. The cabbage leaves were blanched in salted water, left to cool slightly and then I used them to wrap around generous spoonfuls of the rice filling. I topped the rolls with a tin of tomatoes and then baked for about 40 minutes. I didn’t get a picture of it afterwards as we were so hungry, I just served it up without a second thought about a photo! It was such a satisfying dinner but quite light, weirdly. I will definitely make this again, it’s perfect winter food with cabbages in season.

There was plenty of leftover rice stuffing, which we had cold the next day in a Buddha bowl.

Plenty of last week’s vegan banana bread for snacks - I keep forgetting it’s there half the time. Fortunately it keeps brilliantly!

I also made a gorgeous curry with a free Spice Tailor curry paste I got at the supermarket a few weeks ago (I love how Coles sometimes do that!) - I chose the Malabar one and used it to make a curry with potato, cauliflower and spinach, which was absolutely divine. We had leftovers so I added chickpeas to those when we heated it up for dinner a few nights later.

I also made a vat of lentil and walnut ragu - I intended to make shepherds pie at some point this week but was so busy that I barely noticed the sun going down each day, signalling that maybe it was time to think about dinner! So we just ended up freezing some and having the rest with pasta (and then used the leftovers to make a pasta bake, which was also delicious!). I will have to update my 2020 recipe because I have discovered that adding miso to the sauce is a game changer. I would also recommend using a combination of black and red lentils. So good!

Drinking

So much TEA. I made a pot of green tea to keep me going one morning which I really enjoyed and will try to make a habit of. We restocked with our favourite T2s - Melbourne Breakfast, New York Breakfast, English Breakfast, Chai. Bengal Spice after 5pm. Sleepy Time before bed.

Watching

Did you catch my six months off social media video? :)

Snatch (Blu-Ray) - Tom had talked about this film for years but I’d never sat down and watched it with him. A gangster film is never going to be PC is it, but if you can get past that, it’s absolutely hilarious and great fun.

Star Trek Picard (Amazon Prime) - I was surprised by how much I enjoyed this. Star Trek fans such as my darling husband have long celebrated how the various series and movies hold a mirror up to the world we live in now, and I found this particularly so with this series. Some critics said such commentary was “unsubtle” but I disagree - I think the level of hatred, intolerance and dysfunction in our world is such that we can’t really afford to be subtle anymore. I especially loved Ito Aghayere as the younger Guinan (the character Whoopi Goldberg has played in other series) and wish she had been utilised more. When implored by Picard to give humanity another chance and be patient because change takes time, Guinan replies that, as a woman of colour, she doesn’t have the luxury of being patient for change. Picard, on the other hand, as a white man, does. Frankly, I think the world needs more “unsubtle” messages like that!

Wearing

This sweet hat and scarf knitted by my sister’s friend for my birthday. Much needed in these four degree afternoons we’ve been having! My cheeks are almost as pink as the hat and scarf, aren’t they?!

I’ve also been enjoying these deliciously warm Tradie Lady socks. I found them at the supermarket and they’re better than slippers.

Proud of

Tom for rocking his first class as a UTAS tutor!

My sister who gave me the hat and scarf, for many reasons.

A dear friend who has raised her son, my godson, alone and continues to meet every challenge of solo parenthood with grace and fortitude.

Myself, for being brave and applying for something that felt like a real stretch. But I refuse to let another year pass where I let imposter syndrome get the better of me.

My father, for giving a beautiful speech at his best friend’s wake.

Quote of the week

“He who is brave is free.” - Seneca. This one is for you Bob xx

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! I hope you’re also finding things to savour and ponder, that give you both pause and joy.

this week

Tempus fugit baby! I couldn’t resist snapping this in the Kensal Green Cemetery when we were in London a few weeks ago.

Time flies, and never more so than when you are jet-lagged! Time has taken on a strange quality since our return. Case in point, I had a phone call earlier in the week from a tradie, organising a time to come around.

“Is this Thursday any good?” they asked.

“July the seventh? Yes, that’s fine,” I said.

“No, this Thursday - June the thirtieth,” they replied, to my embarrassment. I honestly didn’t know what day it was. I still don’t, really!

I’ve always found coming to Australia harder in terms of jet lag and adjusting to the time. At least I’m no longer wide awake at 3:30am every day - that got old very quickly, especially seeing I had to present a paper at a conference on one of those days! It really is a miracle that I was coherent.

Unsurprisingly, the minute my conference was over I was hit with a little cold - cough, congested nose, the usual. We took RATs and they were all negative. So the past week has been all about laying low and taking things slow. The cold seems to have passed now and I’m back to wanting to hit my 10,000 steps a day and Do All The Things.

I really am gobsmacked that Tom and I have managed to dodge COVID with our international trip, Dark Mofo and my conference. But we have taken, and will continue to take, every precaution, regardless of the fact that there are hardly any mandatory ones in place anymore. I’m not convinced that’s a good thing but I know I’m in the minority on that score. I guess time will tell!

And as for the other terrible thing that’s been in the news this past week, I echo the words of Ann Friedman:

“My dominant feeling is still anger but lately the rage comes in flashes that punctuate an overall mood that I can only describe as ‘shrug’. It’s settled over me like a thick blanket. I’m just letting the algorithm autoplay. I am skimming the headlines but not clicking the articles. I’m sending some expletive-laden texts but mostly I’m annoyed. I’m tired. I’m resentful of having a body that’s capable of getting pregnant. Whatever. How can I feel both of these things simultaneously? Such hot rage and such deep resignation? Screaming, but also shrugging?

…I’ve been preparing for things to be so much worse my entire reproductive life. And many, many people in this country have long been living the so much worse future that some of us have the luxury of dreading. Despite the demanding emails and blaring alarms of this moment, it’s not a departure or a regression. It’s a continuation.”

Ann’s weekly newsletter comes highly recommended by me, FYI.

Favourite experience/s of the week

Being reunited with my family - those unaffected by COVID at least - who I’d missed very much while we were away. It was particularly wonderful to see our two-year-old niece again, who had grown and progressed a great deal in the five weeks since we’d last seen her. She performed a play of The Three Little Pigs for us, and then got Tom to join in as the Big Bad Wolf, which was so adorable - though he definitely adopted aspects of Negan from The Walking Dead in his portrayal, which was hilarious! I was crying with laughter.

Several cups of tea on a sunny afternoon with a good friend, with whom I could decompress from the trip and some various other things that I won’t be able to write about for some time, if ever. Oh, how I look forward to my old age and being able to write a give-no-fucks memoir! In the meantime the “careful or you’ll end up in my novel” sign I have on my study door will suffice.

Making the submission deadline for a journal I’ve wanted to write for for at least ten years, if not more. The theme for one of their upcoming issues had my name written all over it so I felt I had no choice - overseas travel, stress, jet lag and imposter syndrome be damned! I had a half-finished draft of something I started writing in 2016 sometime that I thought had a kernel of goodness in it. I ran with the original idea but completely rewrote it. I had my usual crisis of confidence on the final read through, but pressed send on the submission anyway. There is nothing quite like the hopeful feeling that follows putting your hat in the ring. “If you’re not failing, then you’re not trying,” my lovely brother-in-law reminded me of last weekend. If they say yes, fabulous - life goal unlocked. If they say no, I have a somewhat decent story I can send somewhere else. Whatever happens, I tried. It’s a good feeling.

Reading

Anita Heiss: Five quick Qs and writing tips from author Kathryn Heyman - Anita’s blog is one of my favourites and I particularly enjoyed this interview, especially Kathryn’s answer to the fifth and final question. Start small. Lower the bar.

Oliver Burkeman: The news [is not equal to] your life

The Guardian: “He died in his 30s living the life he had dreamed of” - I can’t wait to see this film, which has just been released in the UK. I hope it gets a showing somewhere in Australia!

The Audacity: Why Are You Stranded? by Nicole Zhao

The Age: Scott Morrison’s downfall marks end of Howard-era ascendancy - seeing we left Australia less than 48 hours after the election, I’m still getting used to the idea that we have a new PM (thank goodness!) and I’m catching up on all the commentary. This is by Richard Flanagan who, as always, is right on the money.

Wintering by Krissy Kneen - I bought this book last spring but was saving it for winter, and it didn’t disappoint! I tore through it greedily in a few days. I sometimes grow weary of the Tasmanian Gothic trope so prevalent in our literature but there is a reason it works - Tassie, particularly its remotest parts, can be very wild and unnerving. It’s the perfect place to set a domestic thriller, really. I really enjoyed this book, set in a familiar landscape in a town not too far from where I grew up; the creepy shack and the ‘widows’ Jessica befriends when her boyfriend goes missing; the quite clever and haunting symbolism. If you like books set in Tasmania and you’re after an absorbing winter read, I highly recommend this!

Listening to

WILD with Sarah Wilson: Julia Cameron, how to live The Artist’s Way

The First Time: Masters Series: Michelle de Kretser

Better Reading: Catherine Deveny on honesty, dyslexia and being an ‘arts tradie’

And thanks to Glastonbury, we’ve been playing some of our favourite acts all week - Jessie Ware, Pet Shop Boys, Primal Scream, Wolf Alice, Crowded House and of course Macca!

I also discovered this incredibly soothing album of Bach keyboard concertos which I’ve had on repeat all week - so much so that Cyprien Katsaris almost knocked Ludovico Einaudi off top spot for my most-played artist on TIDAL in June. But not quite! Ludovico had the edge thanks to that 17 hour flight from London to Perth - he and Nils Frahm were the only reason I got any sleep!

Eating

It’s been such a treat being in my little kitchen again! With many new cookbooks and lots of ideas from our travels, I’ve had lots of fun cooking this week. It’s definitely, and subconsciously, been a week of spice.

This is a Sri Lankan style jackfruit curry - I found I’d somehow acquired four cans of jackfruit in my pantry and was keen to use it up. Cooked low and slow for two hours, the jackfruit becomes meltingly tender and takes on a similar texture to pulled pork (not that I’ve ever tried that, so I’ll have to take peoples’ words for it). I loosely followed this recipe but put my own spin on it - I added diced sweet potato and frozen green vegetables, and instead of sugar I diced half an apple that I had leftover from porridge that morning, which cooked down beautifully and added sufficient sweetness. I also used Kashmiri chilli powder instead of cayenne pepper. So I can’t claim this was authentic or even that close to Dini’s original recipe but it was so delicious! I even made the roasted curry powder. We ate this over several nights and I think there’s still some in the fridge…

I also made the cauliflower, cashew and coriander soup from Rachel Allen’s most recent book, Soup Broth Bread which Tom got me for my birthday. I could happily have soup for every meal, especially this time of year, and this one was particularly delicious. It gets its fluro-yellow colour from the hearty tablespoon of turmeric! Perfect for keeping winter colds at bay. I daresay I’ll make this again but I might swap half the cashews out for yellow split peas next time, for more fibre!

I made Nigella’s vegan gingerbread which is as sticky and delicious as it was when I made it at Christmas, but the deep spicy flavours feel more appropriate for colder weather! It is one of those bakes that only improves with time and so every time we cut a square to have for elevenses or with an afternoon mug of Bengal Spice, it’s even stickier and more moist than it was the day before. At Christmas, I think it lasted a few weeks. I can’t see it lasting that long this time, to be honest! It’s so good. Vegan or not, if you love gingerbread or ginger cakes, you need to make it.

Only I would attempt something like Dishoom’s house black dal with jet lag - but it was completely worth it. I couldn’t find deggi mirch chilli powder so used Kashmiri, and it was fine. I also added a lot more tomato paste and used vegan alternatives to butter and cream, also fine, if not better. It takes hours and hours to cook but if you’re home anyway it’s not that big a deal - you just have to remember to go back and stir it every now and then, and also ignore the old sock smell of cooking lentils. But once you’ve made it, you’ll be rewarded with so many delicious dinners and lunches, especially if you double the recipe as I did. And if you find yourself with a small amount left, not quite enough for a meal on its own, you can turn it into a spicy tomato soup with a tin of diced tomatoes or passatta - which I did for lunch!

Watching

Dr Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (Disney+) - a Marvel film rarely disappoints (I still don’t know what they were thinking with Eternals?!) in terms of fun and escapism, and we both really enjoyed this one. The first Dr Strange movie is one of our favourites in the entire franchise so this had a lot to live up to. I missed the grounding wisdom of Tilda Swinton’s Ancient One and think it needed an equivalent character, as things did get a bit loopy. But still enjoyable! My favourite scene was with the Illuminati - if you’ve seen it, I’d be curious to know if you agree!

Obi Wan Kenobi (Disney+) - I’ll watch anything with Ewan McGregor in it. And I was surprised by how much I enjoyed this, as I find Star Wars as a whole quite hard to get excited about (mostly because it all goes over my head!). The acting in it is quite brilliant, particularly from the children.

Man vs Bee (Netflix) - a surprisingly compelling show, we watched all nine episodes in one sitting (they’re only about 12 minutes each, admittedly) because each one ends on a bit of a cliffhanger. Rowan Atkinson plays Trevor, a recently divorced man who needs both a home and job - he finds both by house and dog-sitting for a wealthy couple who are off on holiday. The designer house is full of priceless art and the dog has a very particular diet and routine. Add to that, Trevor is a tad obsessive about things - we learn that he got fired from his job at Asda due to a supposedly “evil trolley”. So when a mischievous bee flies into the house and Trevor can’t rid of it, you just know disaster is afoot! I was surprised by how enjoyable this show was, and by the twist at the end. Highly recommended!

Quote of the week

“Anything worth having has its price.” - Joan Didion

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post with me, please do! I hope you’re well and finding things to enjoy and savour too xx