this week

Is spring just around the corner?

I don’t know where the last week went either! It’s proving to be quite a good practice to take some time to reflect on what the week has actually held, otherwise I run the risk of them all blurring into each other and forgetting all the small, sweet things, the little pockets of joy. The things that might seem inconsequential at the time but later I’ll be pleased weren’t lost.

I also enjoyed doing a little ink painting of my blue jug of pink tulips.

Favourite experience/s of the week

At the risk of sounding like a complete nerd, I did enjoy my annual review on Wednesday. The enthusiasm and support for my PhD project at my university is beyond anything I could have hoped for and always spurs me on. Which was a good thing, as I had to spend the rest of the week preparing my exegesis draft for my supervisors to read. I felt oddly scared sending that to them on Friday evening - more scared than I’ve been sending them creative work. Is it because, ironically, I am taking more risks with the exegesis, putting myself out there that little bit more? It was an interesting thing to think about and energy that I hope to transfer over to the creative work too.

I also loved my Hidden Nerve lecture on Thursday evening, which was given by Amanda Lohrey. It’s not often that you get to hear thoughts on the craft and pearls of wisdom from a writer of Amanda’s stature (though she was my lecturer for one of my undergraduate units 20 years ago, and I so wish I had been more aware of what a great writer she is back then!) so my hand could barely keep up as I tried to scribble down everything she said. The first thing she said was that there are absolutely no rules in writing - “except don’t be boring. But even that is problematic and subjective too!” she laughed. The overriding message I took away from everything she said was that every book is a gamble, reading is a deeply subjective experience and therefore you can only ever really write for yourself. Write the book or page that you find interesting.

Reading

Last week’s bedtime reading was The Bloomsbury Cookbook which, while fascinating, gave me some very peculiar dreams one night which I didn’t fancy a repeat of (!), so I have switched to some favourite spiritual books on Kindle over the last week, which get my mind into a peaceful space before sleep (always advised). I’ve been reading What Helps: Sixty Slogans to Live By, Coming Home: Refuge in Pureland Buddhism, and Just As You Are: Buddhism for Foolish Beings, all by Satya Robyn whose writing is the equivalent of a soothing hand on the brow.

I started reading one of my Persephone books I bought in London - Random Commentary by Dorothy Whipple, who I am a huge fan of and on the pleasures of whose work I have waxed lyrical many times before. As I suspected, I’m finding it fascinating and so very entertaining. This week’s quote of the week is from this book.

Sydney Review of Books: In The Garden with Amanda Lohrey (preparation for this week’s Hidden Nerve!)

LitHub: Winning the Game You Didn’t Even Want to Play

Bustle: What Do We Owe Each Other?

I feel certain I read more than this but, to be honest, the week has passed in a blur of writing and rewriting my exegesis, cutting words, putting them back in, switching things around and trying to entice some order out of the chaos!

Listening to

My “writing beats”, general “for writing” and inner winter playlists were on repeat, as well as a lot of blues, for some reason. Alabama Shakes was in there a lot, particularly this song. Nick Cave and Ludovico Einaudi were also constant companions, but that’s pretty standard!

Best Friend Therapy: People-pleasing - why do we do it? Is it really nice to be nice? How do we say no? Hooray, this podcast is back with another season and yet again delivers some profound and illuminating messages. I had to stop the washing up, take off the gloves and press rewind and listen to one section several times over, such was the power of what Emma had said.

The Imperfects: Glenn Robbins - Listening To The Voice In Your Head - I listened to this last week and loved it so much I listened to it again! I’m also halfway through the episode with Dr Emily, The Pesky Hedonistic Treadmill.

Vegan Sunday Roast

Eating

We had a delicious Sunday roast - I used up a box of vegan stuffing I bought sometime in 2020 when I was looking for things in the supermarket that would last a long time if indeed we were at the beginning of the apocalypse. The stuffing was made and then wrapped in puff pastry with some piquant sun-dried tomatoes. To accompany the roast, we had roast potatoes, sprouts and boozy carrots (carrots cooked in foil in the oven with white wine and herbs). I made enough for a crowd so we had leftovers on Thursday night when we were both working until late, which was nice as it felt like someone else had done the cooking - well, Past Phil had!

Creamy roast pumpkin risotto

There was also a delectable roast pumpkin risotto which has almost overtaken tomato risotto as my favourite this winter. It tastes so creamy and indulgent.

Vegan banana bread - made in the new air fryer!

Sticky crispy cauliflower, which I served with fried rice - I really didn’t expect this to work, seeing it was baked in the oven. But it was brilliant, and the cauliflower pieces were beautifully crisp!

Cauliflower stalk and lentil tacos - I used broccoli and cauliflower stalks (and cauliflower leaves) for this recipe and subbed kidney beans for the lentils - very delicious and no waste! We had these in wraps with cashew queso, which I’ve made many times this year. Totally planning a taco mac and cheese with the leftovers!

Picking / growing

Winter greens are going strong in my mostly dormant garden. Spinach, chard, celery - the latter is particularly abundant. There’s a little kale. The garlic shoots are coming through. The lemons on my tree are starting to turn yellow. I have also spotted some nettles which I’m allowing to grow wild and which I’ll turn into a nettle soup at some stage over the next few weeks.

Watching

Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol (Blu-Ray) - Tom’s choice! Not normally my sort of thing but I didn’t hate it. A plot full of highly improbable things but good fun! Fast-paced, stylishly shot and Simon Pegg was a real scene stealer and kept things lively.

C’mon C’mon (iTunes) - Mike Mills is one of our favourite directors and his latest didn’t disappoint! Shot in black and white, which naturally invites you to pay close attention (a theme of the film), this film follows the story of Johnny, a radio journalist whose current project is travelling around the US interviewing children about their lives and their opinions on the world and the future. One evening, in his hotel room, he randomly calls his sister, who he hasn’t spoken to since their mother died. It turns out Viv, his sister, needs his help - she has a young son Jesse whose father, her estranged husband, is mentally ill. She needs to try and get him into treatment and asks Johnny if he could come out to LA to look after Jesse for a few days. Those few days turn into a few weeks and, under pressure from his boss to get back to work, Johnny ends up taking Jesse back to New York with him temporarily. Johnny has spent a lot of time with children in his work but finds it’s a very different ball game being completely responsible for one, something he isn’t quite prepared for. He both marvels at Jesse and the way a child sees the world, and also finds caring for him 24/7 very frustrating. It’s a typical Mike Mills story in that it appears remarkably quotidian on the surface but there’s actually a lot going on. Mills’ oeuvre is very much centred around child/parent relationships and with this film, it takes a wider look at how children and adults relate to each other. With every scene, we are brought further and further into each character’s world, inviting empathy which I think is very much the message of the film. That and children are far, far wiser and observe much more than they are given credit for. I also love how intertextual Mills’ films are - there’s always part of a text (or several texts) read aloud that then informs your understanding of the characters’ cultural influences.

Quote of the week

“I’m not lost any more. I know what I have to do with my life. I have to write.” - Dorothy Whipple

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! Stay well xx

this week

The ducks in the Botanical Gardens have so much personality and always make me smile!

There was snow on the mountain and ice on our windows this week, so I think winter has definitely arrived. I wore my favourite scarf in all my Zoom meetings and video chats with overseas pals. “Ah, it’s your turn to wear the woolies now,” laughed my dear friend Lisa in the UK, who’d noted my tank tops and dresses over the Australian summer with longing!

There’s been a lot of ‘not easy’ weeks in recent history. I’m learning to roll with it. In one of the podcasts I listened to this week, they quoted Eckhart Tolle who said: “Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it.” Obviously that won’t apply to everything (it would be a bit insensitive to say it to someone who has just suffered a tragic loss, for example) but I appreciate this quote for the fact that it encourages you take back some power, particularly in situations where you feel very vulnerable and at the mercy of others. What is the lesson you can take from it? If you had intended this situation, what was it that you were trying to learn? Sometimes it can help to ask yourself that question, to make meaning out of hard times rather than wallow. As I am wont to do on occasion, admittedly!

I have drawn a lot of lessons from this recent period in my life but the overriding one is to trust myself and my instinct, always. It is very rarely wrong. This week, it was proved right once more and I will never, ever ignore it again.

Favourite experience/s of the week

Having my dear friend Isabel round for dinner! I hadn’t seen her for over three years and it was wonderful to be reunited. I cooked Pip Lincolne’s casserole again, perfect comfort food for a freezing night, and we talked for hours about writing, life, politics, and everything in between. You know how some people in your life are just balm for the soul? Iz is one of those people for me.

I also thoroughly enjoyed this month’s Hidden Nerve lecture, and discussing it with a lovely new friend who I’ve met through the course over Zoom the next day. We were both stunned that we were drinking the same tea, the same way (black, no milk or sugar), in two different parts of the country! I love life’s delightful surprises and synchronicities.

Reading

Sydney Review of Books: Critic Swallows Book by Catriona Menzies-Pike which argues that Trent Dalton, a phenomenally successful Australian author, is “the definitive novelist of Scott Morrison’s Australia” which I found very compelling and deeply thought-provoking. And let’s hope that Scott Morrison’s Australia will be a thing of the past after the election tomorrow.

I also loved Notness by Oliver Reeson who reviewed Yves Rees’ memoir of transition with great care and insight. I found Reeson’s ideas about representation, “reinforcing difference through representation, and how this relates to social power” and what this particular book said about these things really interesting, especially the way global popular culture validates certain ways of being. Reeson writes: “In fevered discussions about the importance of representation in popular culture we are forgetting how many cultures exist, quite successfully, completely outside of global popular culture [my emphasis]. In this idea that a way of being can only be taken up if it is first modeled and seen in popular culture, we are engaging in a bizarre denial of our humanity, ignoring that most of our impulses originate in our mind and bodies, rather than being taken in from an external source.”

Write or Die Tribe: Brad Listi: On Writing Autofiction, Working Through Failure, Quitting Twitter, and His New Novel, "Be Brief and Tell Them Everything" - I enjoyed this interview because it’s always validating to hear other authors talk about the process of trying and failing while you’re writing a book, experimenting with form, realising the form is wrong and starting again, or going in a completely new direction with a work.

Nathan Bransford: I’ve followed Nathan’s blog for years and this week’s post on Breaks, permission and writing was very timely and relatable!

The Wilderness Cure by Mo Wilde - this book is coming out in August, and I was lucky to get an advance Kindle copy to review. I really liked it! A compulsively readable, engaging and compelling book about a woman who decides to spend an entire year eating only wild food - what she can forage. And the challenge begins at the end of 2020 just as Scotland is heading into winter... I think a lot of us would like to think we eat seasonally and locally, but this book showed me that there's a lot more I could be doing to tread more lightly on the earth. One scene has had a profound impact on me - when Mo floats the idea of making a video to encourage people to eat organic food. She proposes making a gorgeous dinner full of organic produce, then placing it in front of people who aren't convinced of the benefits organic food, along with a shot glass of the legal amounts of pesticide and herbicide that you'd typically ingest with non-organic food, to pour over their food like you would a salad dressing. What a brilliant idea. I think such a video would almost certainly go viral and have an incredible impact. Overall, this book comes highly recommended to anyone interested in foraging, eating locally (that's an understatement!) and the natural world. Mo's passion and commitment is obvious and admirable in this very enjoyable and, I think, important book.

I also just read Caitlin Moran’s More Than A Woman and found it very enjoyable too, but more of a memoir this time and less a gritty, full-of-fight manifesto than its predecessor, her massively successful How To Be A Woman, was. Of course one can only write what one knows, but it’s then important to note that this isn’t a book all women will relate to, as the stories are told through a white, cis and educated lens. The parts about her daughter’s illness, however, were beautifully written and very moving.

Listening to

TIDAL inner autumn, yoga, running and writing beats playlists

I’ve also just discovered the Kronos Quartet - wow! Do you know of them? I’m quite blown away.

Best Friend Therapy: Endings - Are they a bad thing? What’s the difference between loss and change? How do we make meaning? I don’t know how they manage it, but the themes of this podcast always seem to be incredibly timely for me. Lots of useful stuff in this episode.

Eating

I had to think about this and try to recall from memory because, since being off social media, I don’t really take photos of my food all the time any more, nor that many selfies, which I find very interesting. I sometimes go through my phone looking for photos to accompany my This Week post and there’s very little, in comparison to how many photos I used to take.

We had the aforementioned Pip casserole for several lunches and dinners, either thinned out with stock as a soup, or with reheated with rice. I also made this wonderful West African Peanut Stew which I’ve made many times since discovering Rachel Ama and her wonderful books over the summer. If you love peanut butter it’s a must-try, and also a great way to clean out all the peanut butter jars sitting in my pantry with a teaspoon or two left stuck to the bottom! I also turned leftovers of this into a soup by thinning out with stock. Gorgeous!

We also discovered, thanks to a kind hostess gift from Iz, these morsels of heaven:

I don’t think I’ll ever eat any kind of chocolate again! They are seriously incredible.

Picking

I’ve been picking ruby chard, celery and kale - there’s still plenty to be had out there. I planted garlic last weekend and to my delight the soil was soft, crumbly and dark, like coffee grounds, and writhing with healthy worms. Bodes well for spring planting!

Watching

The football (by which I mean AFL) with my sister and her husband - I don’t know any of the players any more! I only recognise the commentators….who were players when I last followed the AFL with any seriousness, which was about 15 years ago. My lack of knowledge is a source of great hilarity to the family, as you can imagine.

Long Way Up (Apple TV) - the Long Way series, where Ewan McGregor and Charley Boorman attempt epic motorbike journeys across the world, are our very favourites. No matter our mood, we can put an episode or two of any of the series on and it’s guaranteed to make us smile and ignite that spark of adventure in us. Long Way Up is the latest in the series, filmed 2019 and released in 2020, where Ewan, Charley and their loveable crew ride electric motorcycles and electric vehicles from the bottom of Argentina to Los Angeles, California - 13,000 miles in 100 days. It’s quite the adventure! I love that Ewan and Charley did the whole thing with such mindfulness of the environmental impact and wanting to show that these kind of epic, off-road trips are possible to do with electric vehicles.

Rick Stein’s Secret France (DVD) - I don’t know what it is about cooking shows, but they are the TV equivalent of a foot massage. I find watching them deeply relaxing, nothing makes me switch off as instantly as seeing Rick, Nigella, Jamie or even John and Gregg on the screen. I particularly enjoy Rick’s shows because they combine travel and cooking. Long Weekends is probably my favourite but this one, which takes him all over the less-visited parts of France where there is plenty of good food and wine to be found, is also fabulous. I do wish he’d get another dog sometimes. That Chalky was quite a character!

Quote of the week

“I must choose between despair and energy - I choose the latter.” - John Keats

I’m going to take a few weeks off from my weekly posting, as I need to focus on some other projects, but I will be back with a vengeance in June. Until then, my friends, stay safe and well and know I am cheering you on, whatever it is you’re striving for or working through.

And as always, if you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything, with me, then please do! Thank you for reading xx